Are Muslims Scared of Self-Help Psychology?…

I went to this gathering recently and a sister was saying that the self-help discourse is misguiding because we should have that awareness that Allah is in control of everything.

She also said that the phrase “you’ve got this” is misguiding because you don’t really have this…Allah controls everything.

So…fundamentally, I agree with the foundations of what she is saying, but knowing me, I want to get even more nuanced.

You see the truth is, I have benefitted from parts of secular self-help psychology in the past, I won’t lie. But, Alhamdullilah, Allah enabled me to benefit from this whilst building my understanding of deen and the Islamic world view.

My perspective is that “You’ve got this” is not in and of itself a faulty statement. The truth is, many many people, Muslims included, use this phrase when needing a boost of confidence or self-assurance. It is not a bad thing to be and feel confident as a Muslim nor is it a bad thing to be and feel self-assured as a Muslim. No, it certainly isn’t. In fact, there is a Hadith of the Prophet ﷺ saying “A strong believer is better and is more lovable to Allah than a weak believer, and there is good in everyone, (but) cherish that which gives you benefit (in the Hereafter) and seek help from Allah and do not lose heart”. Many scholars have interpreted this as including strength in competence and in their self-development which makes the believer a valuable contributor to society and this Ummah! We need to nurturer more of this spirit and more of this desire to rise up and develop our strengths.

Phrases like “you’ve got this” only becomes an issue when we say it with an absence of the belief that ultimately, not a single thing happens in existence without Allah’s permission, and when arrogance emerges into the mix.

I think there’s this sense of wanting to reject everything western in many Muslims. But the thing is, I don’t agree with that ‘throwing the baby out with the bath water’ approach. We should take what benefits and enhances us (and aligned with our Islamic world view), and leave what does not serve us. Being interested in psychology and benefitting from self-help psychology does not make you any less of a believer just as being mathematician and benefiting from mathematics in our day to day lives does not make you any less of a believer. As long as neither are going against your beliefs as a Muslim and you're aligned with your greater purpose to please Allah.

So, it’s not the words “you’ve got this”, which are wrong, but what could be wrong, is if somebody says –“you’ve got this” without the belief that it’s all by Allah’s permission. So, it boils down to ensuring that you are orienting yourself correctly as a Muslim, in your foundations, your understanding of your place and purpose, your obligations in this world, and your understanding of the reality of Allah.

To me “You’ve got this” is an acknowledgment that I am capable, it’s an acknowledgement of the potential and strengths that Allah placed inside of me, it’s that part of me that wants to overcome and transform myself into a better Muslim. It is not antithetical to my beliefs about Allah- that will never change. And if other Muslims use these phrases to draw out this confidence and action for the greater good, then Alhamdullilah.

For believing Muslims, self-help discourse doesn’t end at “you’ve got this”, there’s also “Bismillah”, “Anything is possible, if Allah wills it to be”, “I have the strength to this by the will of Allah”, “One step at a time”, “I can do this”.

It’s good to identify as being a Muslim and want to live your live according to Islamic traditions etc. But rejecting something, just on the basis of it coming from a secular discourse, is not critical. And another reason why I say this is because, Islam is a vast religion and is crosses many many borders. There are many revert brothers and sisters who come from non-Islamic countries, and they have unique insights and perspectives (in-line with the Islamic world view and Shariah) which adds value to this Ummah and can often identify issues and blind spots that we experience as an Ummah today. That is an asset.

That’s a part of my take on the place of self-help psychology within the Islamic discourse. I’m curious as to what you think! I’d love to know below…

I’ve spent years immersed in the world of psychology— not out of blind admiration, but out of a deep desire to understand the human soul as a Muslim. My work brings together faith-based psychology and Islamic spirituality, helping Muslim women untangle inner blocks, realign with their purpose, and thrive— in this life and for the next.

If you’re ready to explore how this can look in your own journey, you’re warmly invited to book a free discovery call with me here.